Details from the trial will be made public in the coming days in the interest of transparency; most of the proceedings will air on state-owned broadcaster LR3. The trial looks to be more dramatic than a soap opera, a confidential source within the court reports. The testimony of a wide variety of witnesses – ranging from sailors to pizza restaurant proprietors to security guards – will be heard.
Spelling-challenged attorney Arthur Torny issued the following opening statement to the jury to argue for Fontana's innocence.
"Your Honor, ladies and gentlefigs of the jury. Before you sits a minifig innocent of the charges brought against him. Despite being unable to produce a single eyewitness or piece of evidence proving guilt beyond a reasonable doubt, the prosecution has decided to charge Vito Fontana, my innocent client, with illegally donating money to a presidential campaign. But how did we get here? Allow me to elaborate.
The prosecution would have you believe that Vito Fontana is responsible for illegally donating money to Stephen Studsberry's [sic] campaign. They found illegal campaign contributions from some source in the Federation of Legopolis, and obviously they needed someone to prosecute. So, after Mr. Fontana voluntarily, mind you, flew to the Lego Republic and surrendered to authorities, he was tried for this crime. But they cannot prove beyond a reasonable doubt, much less convincingly claim, that Mr. Fontana has any connection to this crime. What they can prove is that Mr. Studsberry [sic] received illegal campaign contributions. What they cannot prove is that my client, Mr. Fontana illegally made these contributions. None of their evidence will show beyond a reasonable doubt that Mr. Fontana promised or delivered money to Mr. Studsberry [sic]. None of their evidence will show that Mr. Fontana personally knew Mr. Studsberry [sic]. And none of their evidence will prove that Mr. Fontana is guilty of the charges being brought against him.
You will not only hear from the prosecution, you will also hear from us. We will tell you about Paul Cardozo, a former Universal executive whom signed off on all major cash transactions. We will show you documentation proving that Mr. Cardozo knew about and signed off on the withdrawal of the money illegally given to Mr. Studsberry [sic]. Not only that, but we will also bring current and former executives and upper management from Universal to collaborate these documented and indisputable facts. They will also tell you about Mr. Cardozo's role in the company, how he would consistently joke about exploiting the gray area of the law and how this is not the first time his actions have caused trouble for others. You will also hear from a LCPD detective whom will speak about various investigations, including bribery and homicide, that were being carried out against Mr. Cardozo before he committed suicide. He will also tell you that my client has never been convicted or even charged with any form of bribery charges. Finally, you will hear from various security guards working at Universal who will offer verbal, video, and electronic testimony proving Mr. Fontana's innocence.
Ladies and gentlefigs of the jury, you have an enormous task ahead of you, but once you hear all the evidence, I am confident that you too will see that there is only one right choice; you must find Vito Fontana not guilty of all charges."
"Ladies and gentlefigs of the jury, we are here today not only to judge the guilt of Vito Fontana, but also the integrity of our democracy. Mr. Fontana represents crony capitalism at its worst: this minifig, as strong evidence clearly demonstrates, sent presidential candidate Stephen Studsbury $1.5 million in illegal campaign donations. Fontana, and the Universal Corporation as a whole, sought to buy this election. We cannot allow outsiders to meddle with our elections, the lifeblood of our democracy. This case is about the role of money in democracy, and Mr. Fontana symbolizes the very essence of laissez-faire capitalism run amok.
In the coming days, you will here from Stephen Studsbury himself, who will attest to Fontana's guilt. Subpoenaed documents reveal the vast extent of the illicit relationship between Mr. Studsbury and Mr. Fontana, a conspiracy designed to poison the very heart of the Republic. From disguises to lies to secret backroom deals, these two men went to great lengths to conceal their involvement in a sinister plot. As you will see, the avarice and deception of Mr. Fontana reached no bounds. His false claims of innocence and manufactured evidence are an insult to the justice system of the Lego Republic. Upon hearing firsthand accounts of Mr. Fontana's corrupt dealings with Mr. Studsbury, the case will be clear."